Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Fate loves the fearless...

I've been cleaning out my wardrobe and my life in preparation for the big relocation. I'm discovering dozens of forgotten treasures that I adore but never wear, gorgeous pieces that sit in my wardrobe waiting to turn into stories and memories. Too bright, too skimpy, too big, too vintage, too bold, too nana, too edgy; too this or too that for real life. I love them all but most have never accompanied me out into the world, these garments are stuck to their hangers with the super glue of my insecurity.

My goal for the next week is to wear one thing everyday that I have owned for years but have been too afraid to wear. And so my fearless fashion week begins...

There are some women that truly inspire me to bring the crazy into the everyday. Anna Dello Russo, Daphne Guiness, Mary Kate Olsen, Gwen Stefani, Carrie Bradshaw (even if she is a fictional character!).

Sunday, August 21, 2011


I need more room, I need big oceans and endless highways. I need space on the shelf, the chance to be myself, room to breath, time to grieve, moments to keep and smiles to seek. I'm chasing change, tired of living in my cloudy imagination.

Procrastination is fear disguised as laziness. In a few short weeks I will be all alone, in a new town, with a new job, a new apartment, not knowing a soul. Sounds like bliss, sounds like hell, sounds like something I was made for. Jumping in head first, wearing armour made from false bravado, the facade of certainty masking the doubts running through my mind. My fierce independence and ever changing dreams lead me all over the place. Maybe this time I will stay in the same place long enough to see every season change...

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Ridiculously amazing...

I've missed blogging so much over the last few weeks. My life has been upside down and back to front I haven't renewed my Internet connection, so I am currently writing this from a seedy Internet cafe feeling rather sorry for myself.

This weekend has been fan-bloody-tastic. I've had drinks with friends, for the first time in months I have let myself sleep in and press snooze every ten minutes for a good hour. I've read the Vogue and Bazaar September issues at least 3 times over and lost myself in the adds and gloss.

I am noticing small "incredibles" everywhere today, I am finding myself reaching into the little pockets of life I ignore when I am on top of the world. Things are tough and I am reminded that everyone is so ridiculously amazing when your life falls apart. When your left stuck, stranded and sad, it softens the heart to life's beauty and humanity. When the world turns cold and every window feels like a locked door, other peoples struggle becomes real. Love to the world, to every weird individual, to each untold story and unknown pain. Your all god damned beautiful.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Freedom of the highway...ahh Byron Bay

This week has been a wild cocktail of tears, heart ache and finding my way. I took some time out and went to Byron Bay for a few days. I became a couch dweller. I laughed, cried and talked my heart out. I drank too much, danced all night, slept all day and ate disgusting, delicious chips and watched bad tv. I let my hair get dirty. I went make-up free. I asked questions. I found answers. I walked along the beach and felt my heart opening up to the world, the future, the things I want and the things that need to change. I re-connected. I blasted old songs in my car and felt the freedom of the highway bringing me back to life. I made promises to myself. I let go. I found myself again and it felt amazing.